Aggresive Language in Speech and Writing

A Reflection on an Individual and What the Person Stands For

I recently attended a friend’s birthday dinner at a members’ club in the Klang Valley.

The dinner was nothing special or extraordinary. However, I was somewhat taken aback by the unnecessarily aggressive and uncouth language used by a fellow guest in relating a particular incident.

For starters, I actually know this person in a very limited sort of way and neither do I consider him a friend. The manner in which he relayed his concerns and the tone of voice that was used was quite uncalled for.

He began to pour out his frustrations in a crude way and peppered his remarks with four letter words and expletives. He also spoke in a loud voice and did not seem to note that there were ladies sitting close by.

Deplore Individuals Who Use Crude and Coarse Language

When reading an article titled, ‘ A tigress to this day “ about a well known Malaysian personality, educator and women’s leader, Datuk Rasammah Bhupalan in The Star recently, I was struck by the comment she made regarding this matter.

Datuk Rasammah said inter alia: ‘ I am disgusted by people who think it is okay to pepper their sentences with expletives. I deplore people who use aggressive language. It is unacceptable to an orderly society, not to mention impolite.’

I fully endorse those sentiments.

When someone by choice or habit uses aggressive language in polite circles, he is actually sending a message about his values in life and his upbringing!

Choice of Language and Vocabulary Reflects on You

When someone by choice or habit uses aggressive language in polite circles, he is actually sending a message about his values in life and his upbringing!

What was the need for the use of such crude and aggressive language at an enjoyable birthday celebration?

Could he have not conveyed his comments in a polite and acceptable manner without in any way offending the other guests at the table? This person, for the record, is about sixty five years old. Was he blind to the fact that there were ladies at the table too and that he should have been more mindful of his colourful language?

At his age, he must have gotten away with a lot in the past but neither advancing age nor the passage of time has mellowed this clumsy lout! He is also clearly a social misfit and one who others will hesitate to invite to events that require a modicum of social grace and etiquette.

In his heyday, this individual was a general manager of a MNC in the Klang Valley and actually graduated with a degree from a local university. I understand, from reliable sources, that this unpleasant and aggressive individual is also given to lashing out at his wife in their own home and even in the presence of visitors!

Letting It Rip on Social Media

I also note with growing apprehension that some otherwise sane and responsible individuals have taken to expressing themselves freely and without any self imposed restrictions on social media. This ability to freely spew all manner of comments seems to be like a drug of choice and a wonderful opportunity! Is it really so?

There is a well known saying: ‘ Publish and be damned.’ Once something coarse and aggressive like that appears in print, it remains there for all to see and then evaluate.

I wonder how these individuals will feel if sometime later their children read what they had to say on these matters and the manner in which they conveyed their views. Alternatively, if they work for some established and well known companies, would they be just as pleased to have their bosses read their unvarnished and unrestrained comments?

There is a great and ever present danger in thinking purely from an emotional angle.

Thinking Emotionally and Without Restraints

There is a great and ever present danger in thinking purely from an emotional angle. Thinking in such an emotional state reduces tremendously one’s ability to think sensibly, rationally and logically.

There is, of course, a ‘ feel good ‘ factor in thinking emotionally. One is able to let it all rip sans common sense and good judgement. In Singaporean speak, we call that ‘shiok sendiri’.

But that is only a temporary feeling.

The long term damage to your reputation and what is left of it will be severe. So it will be wise to re –think this constant need to use aggressive language.

Once this aggressive and toxic language becomes a part of you, your ability to control situations where there is a need to be cautious is limited. It will just come out in an uncontrolled manner and probably with disastrous consequences.

So do think again and take proactive steps to audit one’s speech and writing. It will do us all a world of good.

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3 thoughts on “Aggresive Language in Speech and Writing

  1. Probably his public speaking skills is in dire jeapordy. At all times a respectable code of conduct and decorum must be the pre-requisite as otherwise it reflects poorly on his people skills. Good read master

    Nalliah

    Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

    benmorais posted: “A Reflection on an Individual and What the Person Stands For I recently attended a friend’s birthday dinner at a members’ club in the Klang Valley. The dinner was nothing special or extraordinary. However, I was somewhat taken aback by the unnecessarily “

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